A few months ago, Breigh and I sat in a coffee shop - unheard of activity for us, if you know Breigh ;) - and we had a really good conversation about our someday-families.
We talked about how we'd want to be raised (not that our parents didn't do great jobs, because they did, if we do say so ourselves), what we would teach our daughters that we wished we'd been taught.
We talked about our friend's relationships with their mothers as compared to our own relationships.
We know a girl who's mom is religious, but very lax in her parenting style, and as a result, she has always seemed like something was missing from her life. On the other hand, we know of another girl who's parents are very religious and therefore extremely strict because of that. I remember coming to school one day, and being the shoulder she cried on when she told me how her parents threw away all her clothes and makeup, because guys wouldn't want her after a few mistakes she'd made.
I'm completely heartbroken for these girls because they deserve a life of love and happiness, no matter what mistakes, or no matter what rules they were brought up under.
I know that someday, I want to be a "cool" mom (duh!). I want to be the mom that my kids can come to, no matter what the problem is. But it's a fine line being a mother and being a friend, isn't it?
Breigh and I then looked to our relationships with our fathers, as well as the relationships of the girls we know.
My relationship with my dad is fantastic - I see him at least twice a week, and we try to go out and eat and spend some time together as often as possible. Breigh, who just recently moved out of her parents home (congrats, Breigh!), has always been a daddy's girl, and he is so protective of her, as are her older brothers. It's the sweetest.
But these girls, who I mentioned before, have iffy relationships with their fathers. The girl who has an open relationship with her mother, hasn't ever had a father figure in her life, & the other had grown to resent her father for implementing such strict rules in her life, which we can assume has led to their reckless dating lives.
I recently saw the movie Courageous, and let me tell you - as cheesy as it (and Fireproof) may be, it really hit me hard. I remember in high school, I made a list of everything I wanted in a future husband. After seeing Courageous, I immediately wanted to just trash that list, and start a new one. My new list has only one thing on it: I want a husband who will lead our family in the ways of Jesus Christ, a man who is a spiritual leader and loves Jesus way more than he loves me. I can't even begin to tell you how important this is to me, and I'm so excited for that day when I am married to a man like this.
I want a husband who will take our daughter out on dates and treat her like a princess and show her how she is supposed to be treated. I want a husband who will teach our son to grow into a man of Christ, who will in turn lead his own family someday. Before seeing Courageous, I knew that Godly fathers (and a relationship with your dad) was important, but now, I know just how important it is, and how I need that in my life.
Haley
